When my 88-year-old mother was called for jury duty, she had to submit to questioning by the opposing lawyers. How many can you afford? "She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Coolidge. I work in a courthouse, so when I served jury duty, I knew most of the staff.

At another point, the judge fashioned a handmade sign reading “overruled,” creating a courtroom version of the judges’ paddles on Dancing with the Stars. How many lawyer jokes are there, anyway? Lawyers jokes. 21. . 62.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot. Yeah, they don’t work in the afternoon. brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit lawyer. A: Never enough. "This is where the judge sits," I began, pointing to the bench. . . . Do do, do do.This last part was delivered in song. Q: It was so cold last winter ... (How cold was it?) It also managed to slam its own audience, the jury. 23. The Best Legal Advice Ever… ... was spotted on a billboard ad for the law office of Larry L. Archie: … Here’s our top golf one liners – perfect for a few extra laughs around the course.

You’re traveling through another dimension, a dimension not only of sight and sound, but of mind, a journey into a wondrous land, whose boundaries are that of imagination; that’s a sign post up ahead, your next stop, The Twilight Zone.

“Were you alone or by yourself?” All sorted from the best by our visitors. Absolutely hilarious one liners! them behind their backs. I was once a legal secretary to a young law clerk who passed the bar exam on his third try. Do do, do do. "Would you say you're honest?" As part of my job, I explain court procedures to visitors. See TOP 10 sex one liners. It’s Funny Cause It’s True. The judge listened attentively while I gave him a long, plausible explanation. . My first question: "Did you see the defendant at the scene?" Arrested on a robbery charge, our law firm’s client denied the allegations. Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb? Sidewalks were treacherous after a heavy snowstorm blanketed the University of Idaho campus. While prosecuting a robbery case, I conducted an interview with the arresting officer. 22. I was a brand-new attorney in practice alone, and I had a likewise inexperienced secretary fresh out of high school. . The assistant district attorney asked such questions as: Had I ever been mugged? A young man I know, who recently became law clerk to a prominent New Jersey judge, was asked to prepare a suggested opinion in an important case. The joke’s premise is that everyone with any sense should know who George Zimmerman is. . The next day, defense attorney Mr. Callahan joined in this game, bringing his own, “much nicer version” of the overruled paddle for the judge to use.Amazingly, Mr. Callahan won the 30-day jury trial, but an appellate court threw out the verdict, calling the entire thing a “circus,” adding that “a courtroom is not the Improv.” “We can only imagine what was in the juror’s minds as they endured [this],” the appellate court scolded. If you are playing with a golfer who says they never cheat, they’re also a liar. If you like the longer longer jokes, check out our selection of clean golf jokes here, or if you aren’t easily offended, our rude golf jokes are here.

. I am originally from Indiana. Here are a few of my favorite clean attorney and lawyer jokes. After working on... Sidewalks were treacherous after a heavy snowstorm blanketed the University of Idaho campus. I work in a courthouse, so when I served jury duty, I knew most of the staff. “Sir, are you going to answer me?” The neighbor leaped to his feet. As you can see," I finished, "there are a lot of people involved in making this system work." Attorney: "How was your first marriage terminated?" Always borrow money from a pessimist. I was in juvenile court, prosecuting a teen suspected of burglary, when the judge asked everyone to stand and state his or her name and role for the court reporter.... An investment banker decides she needs in-house counsel, so she interviews a young lawyer. Q: Did you hear about the new microwave lawyer?

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